5 Practical Ways to Cope with a Miscarriage

cope with a miscarriage
How to Cope with a Miscarriage

Source: Pixabay

 

Some women have to cope with a miscarriage after coming to love their baby and after bonding with him. Let’s take the case of Yaa Agyemang, for example. She was looking forward to have her next baby, although she had one other child.

“Kofi Mensah was a baby who kicked as though he was a professional soccer player. He kept me awake at night with his kicking and I often told him to be patient, for the time to play for Accra Great Olympics had not arrived yet. I can still remember his first little kicks, like gentle, loving nudges. Each time he moved, my heart burned with love for him. I knew him so well that I could feel his pain and his joy,” Yaa says.

Unfortunately for Yaa, Kofi turned over violently one night and was pronounced dead the next morning.

If you are one of the women who have suffered a miscarriage, how do you cope with a miscarriage?

1.    Deal with Anger

You may feel angry with the doctors and nurses because you may think they did not do enough to save your baby. Thinking in such a manner will only make you bitter which will only worsen your emotional condition and make you feel miserable.

Right after the miscarriage, talk to a friend or family member you trust. Tell him or her about how you feel, about your fears, worries, anger and so on. This will help to free you of the destructive effects of bottling everything inside you and it will make you feel emotionally relieved. This is an excellent way to cope with anger after a miscarriage.

2.    Do Not Let Other People Tell You How to React

Often when a person suffers a misfortune or tragedy, people are quick to give all sorts of advice. They may tell you to stop crying when you are mourning the loss of your baby, or tell you to show more grief when they see you look happy.

Everyone has his way of handling a big disappointment. Thus, be comfortable about however you choose to deal with the misfortune. If you feel like crying, cry your heart out. On the other hand, if you are strong enough not to feel too disappointed about the loss, be joyful and feel content with yourself. Do not let those around you dictate to you how you should respond to the miscarriage. This is the best way to cope with having a miscarriage.

3.    Exercise

Exercising is one thing you can do to cope with a miscarriage. This activity will make your body release a group of chemicals known as endorphins which can make you feel calm, relaxed,  and at peace with yourself so that you will not be too worried. It is a great way to cope with anxiety after a miscarriage.

Furthermore, exercising will help to keep you occupied so that you will not think about the misfortune too much. To make your periods of exercising more interesting, play your favorite music while you exercise to put you in a good mood.

Here is an easy exercise you can do at home to make you feel relaxed.

  1. Lie on your bed and breathe in deeply. Then, breathe out.
  2. Tighten your toe muscles, then the muscles of your legs.
  3. Keep on tightening all the muscles in your body, then, finally, clench your fingers.
  4. Slowly, relax all the muscles you have tightened. Let the feeling that you are relaxing creep up through your whole body.
  5. Reverse the order of the exercise by first tightening the muscles of your fingers and then proceeding to tighten the muscles of your arms, abdomen and so on.
  6. Breathe in deeply again at the end of the exercise, then breathe out.

 

Do this exercise early in the morning when you wake up and also in the evening before you have your bath.

4.    Eat the Right Foods

One good way to cope with miscarriage depression is to eat foods that can help to keep you in the right mood. Certain foods can help you to feel good about yourself as well as help you to fight the depression that may want to attack you. Some of these foods are: dark green leafy vegetables, Avocados, berries, and oranges. Therefore, eat a lot of these foods after you have the miscarriage and you will feel great so that you can get on with life.

5.    Pray

God comforts those who look to Him for emotional strength when they face tragedy and suffering. He has got the track record and so can help you to deal with your miscarriage. He is the God who strengthened Job when the latter experienced tragedy. He is the God who strengthened Naomi when she lost her husband and two sons.

Pour out your heart to Him in prayer and seek His support. You can pray a prayer such as, “Dear God, I am very sad that my baby died. I am so hurt and disappointed. But Lord, I must going on living. Please help me to cope with the miscarriage pain. Give me grace so that I can continue with my life. Please give me strength to cope with this miscarriage loss. Please help me to have joy in spite of the situation because I know there is hope for tomorrow, as you say in Your Word. Heal my emotional pain and help me to think good and positive thoughts. Amen.”

Conclusion

Dealing with the disappointment of losing the baby, keeping yourself physically active, and eating foods that will help you to fight depression are all good ways to cope with a miscarriage. In addition, look beyond your circumstances and remind yourself that, with God’s help, you can have another baby. Let that thought encourage you to forget the loss and to keep on living.

 

Related Articles:

7 Credible Ways to Increase Your Chances of Getting Pregnant

How to Take Care of Yourself During Pregnancy

How Can I Take Good Care of My Baby?

How Can I Take Good Care of My Newborn Baby?

How to Breastfeed a Baby

 

 

 

Copyright ©2017 All rights reserved Dating Advice for Shy Guys

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How to Potty Train Your Child

Pix. 1. You have to potty train your child well after carrying him for nine months

potty train your child

Source: Pixabay

 

Potty training is one of the issues that will come up as your baby grows and starts eating solid food. Some mothers wonder whether there is a right age at which to give a child toilet training. Others are curious about whether there are methods that a mother can use to make toilet training easy and fun. There are techniques you can use to potty train your child and I want to share some of them with you in this article. 

Should You Potty Train Your Child?

Many child specialists agree that it is not necessary to train your baby from birth. They think it is harmful for they believe that a small baby feels good when he passes his motion and soils himself because he feels the motion are his creation, something which belongs to him and which he cherishes.

Age to Potty Train Your Child

“What is the best age to potty train your child?” some mothers ask.It is quite impossible to train a child until he has learnt to control his urine and motions. A baby will muster the art of controlling the urge to urinate and to move his bowels after he is one year old.

If you are too strict with your baby before this control is established, you will only make your child hate the chamber pot. He will become stubborn and have frequent tantrums. So, forget all about potty training your child until he is well over a year.

Fastest Way to Potty Train Your Child

If you can get a small seat with a potty under it, you may find that your baby may consent to sit on it for a few minutes. If he obliges by passing a motion, be careful not to carry away the potty or show signs of disgust. Let him carry his pot to the toilet and help you to flush it away. Praise him after you flush the toilets to encourage him to adopt that habit. If he enjoys the game you will find that he will oblige you again and again as time goes on. This is one of the fun ways to potty train your child.

Potty Training Your Strong- Willed Child

A strong-willed child may refuse to sit down, or get up before he has performed. The best you can do is to coax him to sit on the chamber pot. You may also choose to take him to the toilet where you should sit on the seat and laugh to show him that moving the bowels is a fun thing to do.

Another way you can potty train this kind of child is to give him a reward, such as a kiss and a moment of cuddling, whenever he finishes with the act. If he sees that every time he obliges you he gets kiss and a show of love, he would be more willing to move his bowels.

Easy Ways to Potty Train Your Child

It is a good idea to leave a part of a toddler’s training almost entirely to himself in the first year. Just say “wee-wee” when he urinates and “pooh-pooh” when he soils himself so that he will associate those actions with those words.

During your baby’s second year, he will become more aware of wetting or soiling himself. It will make him more conscious of what he is doing. You will realize that in no time he will say “wee-wee” or “pooh-pooh” before he wets or soils himself.

How to Potty Train Your Child at Night

Give your baby liquids and fluids mainly in the morning and afternoon but refrain from giving him any fluids or liquids after  5.00 p.m. so that he can urinate most of these liquids and fluids before you go to bed. With time his bladder will learn to hold on until the morning and, consequently, he will not wet himself at night and cry to disturb you.

Also, wake your child up at 10.00 p.m. or thereabouts. Ask him if he wants to “pooh-pooh” so that you can help him to move his motions before you sleep.

How Not to Potty Train Your Child

There are a few things you must avoid when you want to potty train your child:

  • Do not force him to pass a motion if he does not want to. Do not nag at him too much or else you will make him withhold his movements for days and become constipated.
  • Avoid too much fuss and anxiety. Fussing around the child will make him tense and he may take a longer time to gain control over himself because tense, highly-strung children take a longer time to attain control than relaxed ones.

Conclusion

If you want to potty train your child in a way that will be less stressful and make the child co-operate, then you must refrain from putting pressure on the child to kow-tow to your ways, but give him some freedom to be a child. This will make the child more willing to move his motions to please you.

 

You might also like to read about how you can take good care of your newborn baby and also how to take care of him as he grows.

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2017 All rights reserved Dating Advice for Shy Guys

 

How to Increase Your Chances of Having a Boy Using Shettles’ Method

Pix. 1.  Making love close to ovulation can increase your chances of having a boy

having a boy

Source: Pixabay

 

Do you know you can choose to have a baby boy if you want to? That’s right! There are a number of scientific techniques that, research claims, can be used to increase the chances of having a baby boy.

One of such techniques is the Shettles Method. In this article, I want to look at how you can use this method to conceive a male child.

You must be curious, aren’t you? So, let’s get started right away.

The Wife’s Ovulation Date Must Be Determined

Pix. 2.  Determining your ovulation date can increase your chances of having a boy

having a boy
Source: Pixabay

 

According to the Shettles Method, when a couple has sex as close as possible to the time when the woman releases an egg from her ovary it increases the couple’s chances of having a baby boy.

It is possible that a woman may not know when she ovulates. If the wife does not know the signs that can tell her that she is ovulating, then these tips will help her:

  1. She should observe the mucus that comes from her cervix every day. Just before ovulation occurs, the mucus tends to be elastic and watery, just like the white part of a raw egg.
  2. Take the temperature of your body every morning before you start your daily activities because just before you ovulate, your temperature will rise sharply.
  3. Use an ovulation predictor kit which detects the Luteinizing Hormone (LH) that your body releases just before ovulation.  Shettles recommends that you test for LH between 11 a.m. and 3 p.m. and again between 5 p.m. and 10 p.m. every day so that you can notice the sharp rise in LH levels in your body immediately it happens.

The Husband Should Try to Increase His Sperm Count

The husband should do whatever needs to be done so that he can have a lot of sperms to raise the likelihood that when he sleeps with his wife she will get pregnant. Accordingly, the husband should refrain from having sex with his wife from two to five days before she releases an egg.

Here are a few things a husband can do to increase his sperm count:

  1. Keep your testes cool. You can do this by staying away from hot areas of the house, such as the kitchen, and also by wearing cotton underpants. Furthermore, avoid wearing underpants that press the testes against your body.
  2. Eat a lot of fruits and vegetables.
  3. Eat a lot of nuts, such as tigernuts, Brazilnuts, and almonds
  4. Consume a lot of seeds, such as sesame seeds and watermelon seeds.
  5. Avoid smoking and drinking.

Make Love Very Close to Ovulation

Make love when the wife is very certain she is ovulating. Try to make love about 24 hours before the wife starts ovulating and end it 12 hours after she has started ovulating. Shettles Method assumes that male sperms, though fragile, can reach the egg faster than the female sperms because they are smaller and faster than the female sperms, which are strong but large and slow. Therefore, when you have sex as close as possible to ovulation, you ensure that as many male sperms as possible can reach the egg immediately after the husband releases them.

The Wife Should Experience Orgasm

Male sperms die faster in the acidic environment inside the woman’s vagina. When the wife experiences an orgasm, it increases the likelihood that many male sperms will survive and fertilize the egg because extra cervical fluid, which reduces the acidity of the vagina, is released . This makes the resulting environment conducive for the male sperms thereby increasing the likelihood that many of them will survive to reach the egg.

Conclusion

These are some of the things you need to know about having a baby boy using the Shettles Method. Research shows that this method is moderately effective, but if you desire very much to have a boy, there is no harm in trying this method to see how things work out. Who knows, you could be one of the  couples who achieve success when they use this method. Moreover, it is far cheaper to do than some of the other methods, such as using PGD with In-Vitro Fertilization which costs more than $20,000 and for which results are not guaranteed.

If, on the other hand, you desire to have a baby girl, then you must read this article.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2017 All rights reserved Dating Advice for Shy Guys

 

 

How to Breastfeed a Baby

Pix. 1.  How to breastfeed a baby while sitting upright

breastfeed a baby
How to Breastfeed a Baby

Source: Pixabay

 

Every pregnant woman has to decide whether to breastfeed a baby or whether to feed a baby with artificial food.

There are several advantages of breastfeeding your baby:

  1. It is convenient and time-saving. You do not have to wash or sterilize bottles, make sure the food is at a particular temperature, or have to prepare the food as it happens when you give your baby artificial food.
  2. Studies suggest that women who breastfeed are less likely to develop breast cancer.
  3. It will help you to lose some of the weight you gained during pregnancy.
  4. It will help your uterus return to its normal size.
  5. A breastfed baby is less likely to be infected with bacteria, fungi, or viruses.

If you decide to breastfeed your baby, you must, first of all, prepare your breasts for breastfeeding whilst you are still pregnant.

Preparing Your Breasts for Breastfeeding

From about the 30th week of your pregnancy hold the outer part of your breasts gently anytime you have your bathe and massage them towards your nipple. After you do this manipulation for a period time you will see that a yellow liquid, called colostrum, will seep out of your nipples.

This exercise will help to keep the milk ducts of your breasts open as well as help you learn how to express your breasts so that you will have little problems doing it when your baby is born.

Prepare Your Nipples

From about the 30th week of your pregnancy wash your nipples with water anytime you have your bathe and dry them carefully, and then rub a little anhydrous lanolin on them. Draw out each nipple and roll them very gently between your forefinger and your thumb a few times. As a result of this exercise, your nipples will become flexible and will not crack when your baby sucks.

Various Positions in Which You Can Breastfeed Your Baby

There are a number of ways you can position yourself so that you can breastfeed your baby properly:

  1. You can breastfeed a baby while sitting upright.
  2. You can breastfeed a baby while lying down in bed.

 

How to Breastfeed a Baby While Sitting Upright

Sit in an armchair and put one arm on an arm of the chair. You may choose to put a pillow on the arm of the chair if that will make you feel more comfortable. Let your baby sit on your thighs and support him with one hand. Your

breastfeed a baby
How to Breastfeed a Baby
breastfeed a baby
How to Breastfeed a Baby

baby’s head must rest on the elbow joint of the hand you are using to support him, whilst the lower part of that same arm supports his thigh or the lower part of his back.

Remove your breast and hold it with your other hand. Push your nipple gently towards your baby’s mouth and press your breast away from his nose so that he can breathe properly. Make sure that at least some of the areola (the dark part around the nipple) is inside your baby’s mouth. Continue to hold the breast firmly as your baby sucks.

You may read more about it here too.

How to Breastfeed a Baby While Lying Down in Bed

Put your baby in a supine position on the bed. Lie down on the bed beside your baby, facing it. Make sure you are comfortable.  Draw your baby close to you and make sure his head is pointed directly at your nipple, but not looking up, down, or to the side. Positioning your baby in such a way will prevent him from pulling your nipple to one side which can cause you pain.

How to Breastfeed a Baby with Teeth

Whether you breastfeed a baby while sitting upright or while lying down  in bed, tilt your baby’s whole body towards you. His head should face your nipple directly. Then, push your nipple about one inch into his mouth so that his lips forms a seal on the breast. This will prevent the baby from biting your nipple. Remember to press your breast down from your baby’s nose so that he can breathe well.

Conclusion

When you breastfeed a baby, which forms part of taking good care of your newborn baby, it will help you to bond with him properly. The spectra s1 baby breast pump and spectra s2 baby breast pump can also help you to feed your baby if you are a career woman.

You must also remember  that to be able to breastfeed your baby well, you have to take good care of yourself when you are pregnant.

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2017 All rights reserved Dating Advice for Shy Guys

 

 

How Can I Take Good Care of My Newborn Baby?

Pix. 1.  How can I take good care of my newborn baby?

take good care of my newborn baby

Source: Pixabay

 

“How can I take good care of my newborn baby?” That is a question some new mothers ask themselves when they consider the responsibility of looking after the frail, little being they bring into the world.

Well, I sympathize with all new mothers who feel apprehensive about taking good care of their babies for it is not an easy task. I share your concern and so have put together this article to give you a few tips so that you can make your baby feel happy.

How Do I Feed My Baby?

You have the choice between doing exclusive breastfeeding for six months or feeding your baby artificially. The choice you make, which should make it easy for you to feel relaxed and comfortable, depends on what you feel is easy.

Breastfeeding

According to the WHO, “Breast milk is the best food a child will ever have. All substitutes, including cow’s milk, milk-powder solutions, and cereal gruels, are inferior.” Breastfeeding is the best way to feed your baby.

If you decide to breastfeed your baby:

  • feed him or her when he wakes up and starts crying because he is hungry. The more often you feed your baby, the more often your breast will be stimulated to secrete more milk.
  • make sure you never become thirsty during a day. Drink three glasses of water, fruit juice, or milk immediately you wake up in the morning (or even four glasses if you can). In the afternoon drink another four glasses of water, and end the day with two glasses of water.
  • you can decide to use the spectra s1 breast pump or spectra s2 breast pump to help you express your breast milk for your baby.

Bottle Feeding

This method will help you to know exactly how much milk your baby takes. But do not forget that it will give you more work to do: you will have to clean the bottles and the teats  and also sterilize the bottle and teats between feeds. In addition, you will have to cover up the bottles to protect them from being infected.

 

If You Can’t Breastfeed

There are some mothers who, though they would like to breastfeed their babies, cannot breastfeed. You do not need to feel guilty, disappointed, or become defensive when others talk about the wonderful moments they have when they breastfeed their babies.

All you need to do is to choose a good brand of artificial feed and to use that brand consistently to feed your baby. When you are about to feed your baby, hold him snugly in your arms and let his cheek brush against your breast so that he can get the feeling of being close to you while you give him the bottle.

Whilst feeding him

  • ensure the hole in the teat is large enough or else your baby will get tired sucking and he may not get enough milk;
  • keep a fair amount of pull on the bottle so that your baby has to tug a little;
  • hold the bottle tilted so that the teat is always full of milk; and
  • burp your baby half way through the feed and also at the end of the feed.

 

Baby’s Motions

For the first few days after you give birth to your baby, he will pass stool which may be greenish-black in color. This motion, which is known as meconium, is normally smooth and sticky. As time goes on, your baby’s motions will change in color.

Your baby may do only one or two motions a day in the first few months after you come home from the hospital. If he gets constipated, give him more frequent or longer feeds or stop giving your baby sugar, especially white granulated sugar. Furthermore, make sure you give your baby enough liquid. If your baby seems fretful while awake, give him water with a little fruit juice added. Giving your baby two drinks in the morning, two in the afternoon, and two in the evening will help him to move his bowels easily.

 

Taking Care of Your Baby in Summer

Small babies feel very uncomfortable when the weather is hot. There are a variety of things you can do to help your baby keep cool and comfortable when the temperatures hit the roof between June and August.

Clothing

Dress your baby in natural fabrics such as cotton or finely knitted wool. Avoid dressing your baby with clothes made from synthetic products. If your baby is very young, dress  him in a light gown, a vest, and a light wool jacket. Older babies—three months on—can wear cotton dresses which allow their legs the freedom to kick.

How to Protect His Eyes

A baby can easily get red-rimmed watery eyes if the summer sunlight is too strong. Dark colors near the eyes of the baby can help to reduce much of the glare. Therefore, dress your baby in green, blue, or brown instead of white before you take him for a walk in the sun.

Conclusion

If you feed your baby well, make sure he passes stools regularly, and ensure he is comfortable during summer, you will have no need to ask the question, “How can I take good care of my newborn baby?” because your baby will be happy and you will be happy as well.

 

You might want to read this article if you are pregnant or hoping to become pregnant very soon.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2017 All rights reserved Dating Advice for Shy Guys

 

 

How Can I Take Good Care of My Baby?

Pix. 1.  How can I take good care of my baby?

take good care of my baby

Source: Pixabay

 

“How can I take good care of my baby?” you may be asking right now as you read this article. I want to show you how you can take care of your baby’s skin, his hair, and plan your day so that you can give your baby the kind of care he deserves.

If you want to be able to take good care of your baby, however, you must begin by taking good care of the one who will be looking after baby: You!

1.    Take Care of Yourself First

You need to be in the best of shape physically and psychologically before you can take good care of your baby. One thing that you can do to get yourself in the best frame of mind is to solicit assistance from your parents or siblings. Talk to them about the possibility of spending about two weeks with them after you deliver. This arrangement will help you in two ways:

  1. You will have time to concentrate on the care of your baby since your parents or siblings will do the household tasks.
  2. These loved ones, who may have had the experience delivering, can give you valuable tips to help you take care of your baby.
  3. Since you may not be doing household chores, you will have time at your disposal when baby is sleeping and you can use that time to exercise. Exercising will give you the strength and energy you need to take good care of your baby.

 

2.    Taking Care of Your Baby’s Skin

The skin of a baby’s bottom is very sensitive and so needs regular application of creams to protect it. Accordingly, apply a mixture of zinc and castor oil cream, with a few drops of Friar’s Balsam mixed with it. It is an excellent ointment which will keep your baby’s skin in great condition.

3.    Care of Your Baby’s Hair

Do not use too much soap when you wash your baby’s hair. Wash his hair at most three times in a week with mild soap. This will prevent the occurrence of “cradle-cap”—a scurf condition of the scalp. If you happen to see flakes of scurf in your baby’s hair or crusts on his scalp, remove it with medicinal liquid paraffin and a soft brush. The condition may also cause spots to appear on the forehead and face of a baby.

4.    Colic

It is a condition which causes a baby to suffer terrible pain in his stomach and which, consequently, makes him scream and draw his knees up. Some babies normally suffer from colic between six and ten in the evening. You can deal with colic by putting your baby on his tummy and turning his head to one side. Make sure you do not put a pillow under his tummy.

 

5.    Establish a Daily Routine

When you go home after your baby is delivered and you are not quite settled, it is best to do things as they seem easy to do. Your baby may wake up at irregular times and so it may be difficult to fit him into a time-table.

However when you settle down, it is good to plan a daily routine you are going to follow. A baby grows to like it when life is regular. When he gets to know that certain things will happen at certain times without fail, it will give him sense of security and he will be happier. Therefore, write down a routine for each day and do your best to stick to this plan.

You may decide to draw up a plan such as the one below.

 

Table 1.  A Daily Plan to Help Me Take Good Care of My Baby

Time of Day Activity
Between 6 am and 7.30 am Bathe baby and give him his early morning feed
Between 7.30 am and 8.00 am Prepare breakfast for my husband and myself
Between 9.00 am and 11.00am Walk briskly around the house to exercise and do household chores
11 am – 12.00 noon
  • Have a short rest
  • Talk to friends
  • Read for 10 minutes
12.00 noon to 2.00 pm
  • Have my lunch
  • Feed baby
  • Change baby’s diapers

 

2.00pm to 4.00 pm Take baby on a walk in the pram
4.00 pm to 6.00 pm
  • Change baby’s diapers
  • Put baby in an armchair so he can stretch his legs, kick and get some exercise
6.00 pm to 7.00 pm
  • Bathe baby
  • Feed baby and tuck him into bed
  • Prepare husband’s dinner
10.00 pm
  • Bathe baby and feed him
  • Turn in for the night

 

Conclusion

The answer to, “How can I take good care of my baby?” is to put yourself in the best physical and mental frame, be very observant so that you can deal with any issues that affect your baby’s body, and also to organize yourself so that you can have ample time to feed your baby and spend quality time with him.

You must always remember to feel relaxed as you take care of your baby and enjoy being with him. This will help you to enjoy being a mother, one of the most exciting, pleasurable, and satisfying jobs you will ever do here on Earth.

 

If you are pregnant or making efforts to get pregnant, you might want to read this article.

You might also like to read how to potty train your child, how to breastfeed a baby, and how to take good care of my newborn baby.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright ©2017 All rights reserved Dating Advice for Shy Guys

 

 

3 Important Characteristics of a Good Father

Pix. 1.  A good father creates a loving home for his children

good father

Source: Pixabay

 

A Definition of a Good Father

“What makes a good father?” one might ask. Well, I think a good father is a married man with a son or daughter who provides his children’s material needs as well as provides his children with the emotional and psychological support they need to be able to develop into well-balanced individuals.

Of course, there are many other things besides those mentioned above that can describe who a good father is. In this article, however, I want to look at just three of the characteristics of a good father so that young fathers who aspire to be good fathers, or fathers who know they are not good fathers, can use these characteristics as a yardstick to judge themselves and to improve their parenting skills.

So, what are these 3 characteristics?

1.     He Acknowledges His Child’s Feelings

Adults tend to overlook this fact and treat their children as if they have no feelings and emotions. But children have feelings and emotions just as you do. Children need and want their fathers to know how they feel. If a father constantly contradicts his children when such feelings are expressed, the children will not feel comfortable opening up to you as their father.

In some cases, the child will even start to doubt his or her ability to feel and think for himself or herself. Children generally tend to express their thoughts and emotions in extreme terms.

As a parent who wants to be a good father of a family, be swift to hear what your children have to say, but be slow to speak, and be slow to get angry. Do not deny their feelings or stop them from talking. That is what will make you a good father. In addition, your children will find it easier to trust you and you will be their role model.

When your children have a problem, let them pour out their hearts to you. Only afterwards should you correct them. Children are far more likely to accept counsel if they feel that the parent truly understands them and the difficulties they face.

2.     He Works Hard

When you bring children into the world, it is your responsibility to provide them with food, clothing, somewhere to lay their heads, pay their school fees and see to it that they do not have to shoulder the responsibilities of adults too early in life. Therefore, you have to make sure that you have a job to do at any point in time.

If your job is not bringing in enough money, then you may have to do more jobs so that you can take care of your children. In such a situation, consider doing online jobs and work from home jobs during your leisure hours or on weekends instead of going to a bar with friends or going to watch a ball game. A good father shoulders the responsibilities of taking care of his children and makes that his number one priority instead of socializing.

Not only does he work hard himself, but a good father also inculcates the habits of hard work and thrift in his children so that when they grow up they will be responsible adults capable of living responsible independent lives.

3.     He Creates a Loving Home

Everybody in this world wants to be loved and cared for. So do children. Children need love, care, and attention. When they do not receive the love they need, they wither psychologically and emotionally. In the 1950’s, anthropologist M.F. Ashley Montagu wrote: “What the human organism requires most for its development is a nutriment of love; the source of virtually all health is in the experience of love, especially within the first six years of life.’’

Modern researchers echo Montagu’s conclusion that “children suffer serious crippling effects when exposed to an inadequate diet of love.”

One good characteristic of a good father is that he creates conditions in the home for his children to see that he loves them. A good father will do his best to provide his children with quality entertainment in a loving manner so that they will feel he cares about them. For example, if a man wants to be a good father, he will sacrifice some of his time, sometimes, so that he can go home and play with his children for them to feel connected to him emotionally.

There are a lot of other things a man who wants to be a good father can do to entertain his children so that he can bond better with them. Here are a few of them:

  • Have dates with your daughter so that you can teach her how to handle men. Treat her like a lover when you have these dates with her. This training will be useful when men start developing a romantic interest in her, or when she begins to feel attracted to men.
  • A good father makes time for his daughter and watches movies together with her sometimes so that he can point out some pitfalls in life his daughter needs to be careful of.
  • A good father will entertain his daughter with dance and songs when she is feeling down so that he can lift her spirits.
  • A good father will sit down with his daughter, when the holidays are approaching, so that they will discuss vacation ideas: what she will do with herself during the vacation, whether she would like to travel abroad with him to see exciting countries and places, or whether she would prefer doing an internship so that she can be exposed to the world of work.
  • A good father will sing a gospel song to his daughter in the evening before she retires for the day.
  • A good father makes his daughter laugh when she is sad by cracking jokes to help drive away her sadness.

 

What About Your Son?

A man who desires to be a good father and his son may go to certain places together so that the man can exhibit fatherly care and spend quality time with his son:

  • Take your son to see a soccer game of your favorite team so that he can also develop an interest in soccer.
  • Take a walk at night with him so that you can teach him about life.
  • Go to a beach with him on weekends and teach him how to swim.
  • Teach your son how to fish in a lake close to where you live.
  • A good father will take his son to a pizza joint and buy his son a pizza when the son scores high marks in the end of term examinations.
  • A good father will teach his son how to write a poem to praise his mother (your wife) for bringing him up properly.
  • A good father will give presents to his son on a regular basis so that he can teach the son how to show appreciation to his (the son’s) future wife.
  • A good father shares stories of good fathers with his son to show his son how to become a good father when he grows up.
  • A man who wants to be a responsible father watches movies with good father figures with his son when he can find the time so that he will make his son see how good fathers behave

In addition to the activities above, playing basketball together at home, gardening, watching thrillers together, or together helping your wife in the kitchen (so that your son can learn how to support his future wife in household chores) are all great things a good father and son can do as hobbies.

 

Conclusion

If you want to be a good father, you must not ignore the fact that your children also have feelings, you must do your best to provide your children with their basic needs, and you must also entertain them. All these things will help you to earn the love and respect of your children and, ultimately, you will be a very happy man.

Copyright ©2017 All rights reserved Dating Advice for Shy Guys

 

4 Important Qualities of a Good Mother Every Mother Must Develop

Pix. 1. One of the qualities of a good mother is to be a friend to her children

qualities of a good mother

Source: Pixabay

 

Two women who were dressed in their best clothes were having a small party in a restaurant. A friend saw them and came over to their table to greet them. “What’s the special occasion?” she asked. One of the women said, “We’re having a birthday party for my baby. He’s 2 years old today.” “But, where’s the baby?” the friend asked. The baby’s mother answered, “Oh, I dropped him off at my mother’s house. She’s taking care of him until the party’s over. I don’t think we could have had any fun if he’d been here.”

Doesn’t it sound ridiculous? A birthday party for a baby who was not welcome at his own party? One can argue that the mother in the story above did not show the characteristics of a good mother on this occasion because she neglected to show affection and love for her child on his birthday.

The argument above might lead one to ask, “What are the qualities of a good mother? What are some of the qualities of a good mother every woman with children should aim to develop in her character?”

1.     She is Approachable

If you are a parent, you know that there are times when you are too busy to give your children the attention that they call for. Still, you can assure them that you will make time for them as soon as possible, for one of the qualities a good mother should have is to be approachable. As you keep your word, your child will learn the rewards of patience. He will also learn that he is always welcome to approach you with any problem or care.

As a mother, you must convey to your children the sense that their concerns matter to you. If your child approaches you weighed down with some problem, do not dismiss his concern as trivial. Do not laugh at him. Compared to your problems, the child’s burden may indeed seem insignificant. Remember, though, that it is not trivial to the child. If it matters to the child who is so dear to you and you love so much, should it not matter to you as well?

When your son or daughter confesses that he or she has made some terrible mistake, or when he says something that offends your sensibilities, for example, when he says something profane to your hearing, do your best not to overreact, but try to be mild and reasonable. Keep the lines of communication open and correct the child in love. The ability to control yourself when provoked and to correct in love is one of the qualities of a good mother you should strive for.

2.     She Protects Her Children from Destructive Influences

Let’s say you are about to send your little son to school and it starts raining heavily. What will you do? How will you handle the situation? Will you let him go out into the rain without protective clothing? Of course you will not do that. You will give him something that will keep him dry.

In a similar way, a good mother must find a balanced way to protect her family from the destructive influences that rain down on them from many sources—the entertainment industry, the media, peers, and at times even the school.

Watching pornography is one habit that is destroying a lot of young people all over the world today. For all you know, your children may also be watching it.

One of the qualities of a great mother is that she finds innovative ways to know what her children use their mobile phones and laptops for, the kind of sites they visit frequently, and the kinds of conversations they have on the phone. She also puts anti-pornography software on her children’s phones or laptops so that they are protected from seeing those harmful images.

Another way you can protect your children from viewing pornography, at least in the home, is to buy phones for your young children that cannot be used to browse the internet. If they need information from the internet, let them use your phone at a time when you are not busy and can monitor what sites they go to, in your presence.

One of the great characteristics of a good mother is that she does not give her children a television set of their own. She watches television with them so that she can point out bad characters and bad behaviors in movies and television series to her children in order to counter negative influences and give them the right information.

3.     She Learns How to Teach Them Properly

One of the qualities of an ideal mother is that she knows the proper way to communicate with her  children. The vocabulary of children is limited and so you must know the right kinds of words to use to produce the desired effect in their lives.

A mother who wants her child to enjoy wholesome food does not force huge quantities down his throat. Rather, she prepares it tastefully and encourages him to eat small portions at a time, gradually building his taste for it.

In just the same way, a good mother does not overwhelm her children with too much information at a time. This is what she does:

  1. She lets her words be simple words that they can understand.
  2. She uses short phrases when speaking to them.
  3. She uses plain language that they can grasp easily.
  4. She asks them questions that will give her an incline into what they are thinking.
  5. She uses illustrations that will interest them to teach them about life— illustrations from everyday life, the lives of family members or friends, and also examples from creation.

One of the good qualities of a mother is that she finds the proper way to communicate her ideas to her children so that she can get them to do the right things.

4.     She Seeks Help and Advice from the All-Wise God

The first time that some mothers hold a newborn baby in their arms, all sorts of emotions rise up in them. Some feel deep joy and wonder. For some, there is unease and apprehension: they worry about their ability to take care of the needs of their child.

Given the great influence mothers have on the health and happiness of their children, you may feel a strong need for trustworthy advice on how to be a better mother. And there is no better person to seek advice from than the Heavenly Father who has thousands of years of experience of taking care of His children and knows most about how to raise children than anyone one else. One of the qualities of a good mother is that she humbles herself to seek His help through prayer and reading direct advice and practical examples that can help her become a better mother in the bible. She subsequently does her best to apply what she learns, doing her best to train her children in the fear of the Lord.

Conclusion

Four of the qualities of a good mother are that she opens up to her children so that they can approach her with their problems, she protects them from  the influences of evil forces all around that are threatening to destroy young lives, she teaches her children in ways that will make it easy for them to understand what she wants to show them, and she does not feel too big to ask God for help to train her children.

Do your best to exhibit these characteristics in your life so that you can train your children to become responsible adults you can be proud of. Your children will also be proud to call you “mother.”

Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved Dating Advice for Shy Guys